It's Sharia, Bitch!
From the Crazy Rumor Department here at Rant Wraith central HQ (inside our bomb-proof bunker deep beneath the Undisclosed Location) - this week's Entertainment Weekly, the one with Brando on the cover, reports that Dave Chappelle may have converted to Islam. His publicists refuses to comment.
Say it's not true Dave! He's the bravest comic working today and one of the funniest people around. I hope, hope, hope that this is utter bullshit and Dave is still the man we all know and love: vulgar, self-consciously racist, courageous, gratuitously profane, ass-loving, and over the top.
Please Conspiracy Brother, don't say you've gone over to the other side! You're still a player from the streets who knows how to get his. Now get your skinny ass on tv, eat some pork and make me laugh. Bitch!